Monthly Archives: April 2019

There’s a story in my family about my cousin Amy (a stellar human being, if you’re seeing this: Hi Amy!) coming up to my Aunt Francis (an equally stellar human being from WAY back) when she was feeling badly, and asking what the bottle of pills was for. “Those are to put me to sleep,” …

Continue reading “Vet speeches”

I want to make a t-shirt that says: My IQ > (Bear IQ1+ Bear IQ2+… + Bear IQn)/n which is my way of saying “Smarter than the average bear” which I strongly suspect is only marginally true.

You know, there are certain jokes that I feel are positively iconic… Two racehorses are complaining about their lives and a dog passing by says “Pssh, you guys have it easy” and one horse says, “Wow, look, a talking dog!” One penguin comments to another, “Hey, I never noticed before but you look like you’re …

Continue reading “Early Bird”

I like to think of meetings as “Weapons of Mass Distraction.” ☺

I love that with the movable feast of Easter always being on Sunday and with April Fool’s Day always on April 1, I was around to see them coincide. And I made this highly ouroboric joke. ☺ My favorite bits: The little wisps of smoke over their heads at the end when it was all …

Continue reading “Last Year on April 1…”