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5/12/12

I also invented Words With Enemies. The loser's phone self-destructs. Can't we all just get along? : )

Hey, it would sell. Ba-Zynga!

5/11/12

"An elephant's faithful, 100% But you're such a cutie! Let me pay your rent!"

Yes, it’s an elephant gun. And to be fair to Jolene there, she’s here for love. Did “Horton Hatches The Egg” have any funny overtones for anyone else? I mean, it’s odd that it’s basically a story about how adoptive parents are the real heroes, but that’s odd and touching. The Wickersham Brothers, along with the hundreds of dozens of Wickersham uncles and Wickersham cousins, was like Catholic school all over again; standing firm by what you know is right in the face of the torture of an army of baboons. Dr. Seuss was an interesting man.

5/2/12

They might have fared better if they were wearing clothes. Nothing like not having genitals to make you forget things like that.

You always suspect a guy who’s got a bunch of dismembered Barbies in a box under his bed, but maybe he’s just doing safety simulations, maybe he’s just a scientist. I mean, would you suspect him if he had rabbits wearing makeup or rats with electrodes in their brains… wait. Hmmm. Fine line between scientists and serial killers… especially at that age. Never mind.

 

5/1/12

Death has pretty small lemons... probably he only gets the ones that die on the tree. You know, the ones from Lembo.

Actually, be kind of careful about ingredients whatever the source these days.

4/25/12

I was curious if they'd have a little plastic ring in the set; and if it would somehow slowly take over your mind. Where's the nearest active volcano?

Hi Sonya! That is not supposed to be you. For one thing, she has really big feet.

4/23/12

Apparently 4 out of 5 robots drink martinis. And one just kind of passes out.

Yeah, man, I know what you mean.

4/22/12

I had to wash the sand about nine times to get it right... if I hadn't scrapped the paper a bit, I'd be really happy with the results though.

The second in the Collective Noun series. Hi Sarah, hi Liam, hi Chad.  J I’m thinking maybe a Murder Of Crows next, but it’s kind of graphic… like a bad episode of Law and Order SVU.

1/31/12

Or maybe it was when 30 of them got in that accident in the Volkswagen.

If you’re wondering how so many died simultaneously, it should be obvious: They were clowning around.

1/10/12

You CAN get two angels dancing on the head of a pin, but it requires them to do something they're not allowed to do. "NOBODY puts Baby in the corner." : )

I was thinking about doing this as a sculpture. Because there aren’t enough things in my life that really make my head hurt. The hardest part would’ve been working with titanium, because that’s what you’d need to make this thing balance.

Pinhead angels have the second worst job in heaven. The worst job is Guardian angel. Man, what a nightmare assignment; the only way it could get worse is if we made them change all the diapers too.